Love Chic

Pinkaholic dress, Adidas Originals sneakers, SM Accessories shades and earrings, Hodge Podge pendant. A mix of things I don’t usually put on. Shades, lipstick, dangling earrings, a longer-than-usual shift dress and sneakers to go with all of it.

You know how it’s uncomfortable hearing the sound of your voice on a recording? That’s kind of how the first three are to me. I like when people see my eyes and sunglasses cover them up. I’ve braces on my lower teeth, and lipstick brings attention to that when I speak. Just as dangling earrings bring attention to the fact that my ears rather stick out. Haha.

I usually prefer wearing elaborate necklaces with shift dresses, and leave the more casual pendants like these to when I’m wearing basic shirts. I also never wear necklaces with earrings together; it’s either just one or the other.

When it comes to dresses, I don’t like wearing huge prints. I like the length either really short or really long; never near the knees, especially when I’m wearing flat shoes because I’m not that tall and this gets highlighted by all these things.

And with that, I have just given away some of my nifty tricks for emphasizing one’s favorite features and bringing attention away from the opposite. Except I broke all of them.

But that’s okay. Once in a while, we all gotta step out of our comfort zones.

Whether it’s with small things like wearing things we normally wouldn’t, or with bigger ones like doing what we thought we couldn’t, trying something new leaves us feeling great about ourselves. The initial feeling of unease eventually leads to a sense of accomplishment. Instead of caring what other people think or say of us, we went ahead and freed ourselves of the limits we previously imposed.

A few days ago, my friend Anton challenged me to do one thing every day that’s out of the box. It doesn’t matter what it is, he said, as long as it’s something the old me wouldn’t have done. It’s been a helpful and happy exercise, so I’m sharing it in case you want to try it too. Let me know how it goes! :)
  
Hype this: Lookbook / Chictopia

If a psychic ever foretold I’d be doing this, I would’ve laughed the incredulous thought off, until about two weeks ago. Me, dive? The only time I’m ever near the ocean is when I cover beachfront events for magazines or produce summer segments for a TV show. I can swim only in waters shallow enough that I can stand up with my head above the surface—which suffices to say I can’t swim to save my life.

Yet despite my trepidations about the sea, last weekend found me at Mabini, Batangas with my friends Magel, Joanne, Chez and Chris. Not just to swim, but to learn how to sink. And as I would later find out, to learn many things more.

We got to meet Magel’s friends as well. Dan and Jonathan beside us are intro divers too, while the ones in front (Magel, Anton, Javy and Kevin) have all been diving here for years.

I met these two in 2009. We were all part of the production team of Project Runway Philippines 2 and instantly hit it off. From back then until now, Magel and Joanne have always been a source of strength and wisdom. I know I wouldn’t even think about trying this if they weren’t the people I’d be with.

Pool session with James, our instructor.

We were taught the basics of mask clearing, regulator clearing, equalizing, finning and proper breathing. To my pleasant surprise, I took to water like, well, a duck takes to water. The week before our diving trip, up to the minute I was already parking the car at the resort, I had spent so much time and energy being scared and worried how everything would go. All that wasted effort on something that turned out to be so ridiculously simple!

I volunteered to go first. Pink fins always help give a girl courage.

And then I was off to sea. There was nothing but the steady rhythm of my breathing, harmonizing with the muffled gurgle of a thousand tiny bubbles around us. Even the noise of my own thoughts was drowned out.

Underwater shots care of Javy’s GoPro and underwater camera case.

At first, I held on tight, like a baby about to take her first few steps. But as we went deeper and deeper, the water seemed to be more welcoming, beckoning us to come and see all the beauty she has to offer.

It’s gonna be okay, it seemed to say. Slowly, the current washed away the fears and anxieties and I was able to let go.

The undersea wandering left me wondering why I’ve been squandering all those opportunities in the past to try new things and see what else is out there. Why I’ve let myself be hindered by so many fears I myself conjured up, by apprehensions I allowed people to shove in my head, by regrets I willingly wallowed in.

Joanne and Chez, who were just as afraid at first. When we all came up, the feeling was indescribable.

It helped enormously that I was with three types of divers that day: the inexperienced ones who shared my fears (thank you, Joanne and Chez), the seasoned ones who showed us how awesome they feel (thank you, boys), and the teacher who helped us transition from one to the other (thank you, James).

Above all, thank you, Magel. I’ve been a hermit crab this whole year, and you patiently coaxed me out of my shell to try and do things I previously thought unthinkable.

“Dive, but don’t drown.” I texted my parents and siblings just before I went out to sea, and that’s what my dad said to me. Knowing his penchant for humorous wordplay, he was probably just trying to be funny in telling his daughter to be careful. But his words spoke volumes more than that.

As the sun sank into sea, the realization sank into me that indeed, there are many things that will besiege us. Challenges, triumphs, excruciating sadness, immense joy, failures, victories. Whichever of these pressures arise, what’s important is that we learn to equalize, to go with the flow, to take deep breaths and calmly work our way through the current and not let ourselves be swept away. To clear the fog in our masks that might be keeping us from seeing things clearly. To dive into things and take it all in, embrace what’s enveloping us, but not let it drown us.
   
I can’t wait for what the next experience will be teaching.

Blind Clothing one-shoulder dress, CMG wedges, SM Accessories necklace, earrings and clutch bag, XOXO watch. Contacts from Japanese Candy.

Hype this on Lookbook here, Chictopia here.

Sometimes I get asked how I think of look titles or entry themes. It’s nothing serious or scientific, haha. While uploading the photos, I usually just look for a detail somewhere in the outfit and then try to connect it to the day’s story.

Like this dress with all its lines. Wore it to a dinner date with some awesome people. Lately I’ve been having a lot of these dinners, with old and new friends from diverse backgrounds and countries. Different folks with different strokes, yet somewhere along the conversation, we find intersecting interests. I’ve been learning a lot from them and loving it. I think the Universe is making up for a couple of years of incidental social constrainment. :)

On another note of gratitude, to everyone who’s been continually interacting with me through this blog, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook and/or YouTube, thank you :) It’s still as kilig and inspiring as the first time, and so lots of exciting things are in the works. Here’s to a great week ahead!

What I wore to my brother’s graduation. Shopaholic at SM Department Store dress, Asian Vogue pumps, SM Accessories necklace, bangle and clutch bag.

Hype this on Lookbook here and Chictopia here.

That day, realization upon realization started hitting me like a snowball in the face (not an entirely unwelcome prospect in this hot and humid weather).

My alma mater. I would often come back here for random things—meeting friends who are now teachers, going to church, running errands. Snowball number 1: for years, Ateneo was just a place for me to do stuff at. I never bothered to look around and marvel at the fact that this was where I was shaped, where I grew in intellect and in faith.

Our elders. The professors, deans and leaders of this institution, without whom none of its students would be where they are now. My Science and Society professor, astronomer and physicist Fr. Jett Villarin SJ, is now University President. Snowball number 2: I was in the classrooms of the country’s most intelligent, compassionate and generous people and instead of appreciating that, I would balk and sulk whenever challenges came my way.

The ceremony. There were twice as many graduates this year compared to my batch of about 1,900. Yet even their number is but a tiny percentage compared to the millions of young Filipinos with no access to quality education. Snowball number 3: I was given the privilege of a full scholarship in Ateneo and I gave my bare minimum in return. I let each school day, each requirement pass me by like it was nothing, when it could’ve been another kid of equal skill level and aspirations in my place. I didn’t even try to run for honors or be the well-rounded Atenean I was supposed to be. I was placed in a Merit class of a legendary teacher, Max Pulan, that produced young leaders and achievers excelling in their chosen fields, while I’ve spent the last few years squandering my education on less worthwhile endeavors.

The graduates. I imagined them feeling grateful, excited, hopeful, relieved, maybe a little worried at what the real world holds in store for them. And then I remembered how I felt when in that blue toga. “I can’t wait to get out of here and get it over with.” Snowball number 4: I was so full of teenage angst at my pseudo-problems at the time—petty things that all seem so pathetically trivial now—that I failed to remember what we were taught: be a person for others. What were my trials compared to the sufferings of others? What have I been doing with what I’d been given, to make a difference in their lives?

Vince. It took all those years and his graduation to shake me back into my senses. In a happy coincidence, the resolutions came in time for my birthday.

So, instead of the usual party or dinner, here’s how we celebrated. Duyan Ni Maria (Cradle Of Mary) is a shelter in Angeles City, Pampanga that takes in children as young as newborns until they finish school and can earn their keep.

Sister Alexis Casas, S.M.E. runs Duyan ni Maria. Hers is a story of profound faith in God’s provisions. She was able to build a children’s home out of donations and fundraisers she worked on. Rain or shine, day in and out, she would commute from house to house and organization to organization to solicit funding for her children’s food, clothing, schooling and other needs. She continues to do so until now, even while struggling with diabetes. I can’t imagine my grandmother having to travel around the city in the hot sun with a never-healing wound in her leg, working to make ends meet! Yet she’s always smiling and saying that God never fails to provide her with what she needs—sometimes, it’s not what she hoped for but turns out to be even better.

Sister Alex knows all the names of all the children, and she introduced them to me one by one. They told me their stories. Some were abandoned at birth in public hospitals. Others were rescued or ran away from abusive homes. Most of them were named by Sister Alex herself, and they treat her like their real mother.

It was a small party and the food was simple—just spaghetti and fried chicken—but the way the children were so excited and happy, you’d think it was a lavish feast on Christmas eve! Gratitude is such a nice feeling.

We often see in movies or TV shows how unruly it can get in children’s homes. They were polite and gracious and cheerful. Sister Alexis’ kids couldn’t be further from that depiction. Then again, them being raised by a soft-spoken and loving nun, it isn’t surprising at all how well-behaved they are.

In collared shirt is my uncle Tito and behind her is my aunt Bunny, siblings of my mom (who took all these photos with my phone). They’ve been doing apostolate work ever since I can remember, and Duyan ni Maria is one of the places they visit to bring food and do tutoring. The lady in purple is Sister Vicky, who helps Sister Alex to manage the place. They kept thanking us profusely for coming over but what they gave me is far more precious.

Graduation. Learning enough to take you to the next level. I graduated many summers ago and each summer I turn a year older, but if I were to be honest, this year is the first time in a long while that I actually felt it. :)

   
Today’s national holiday translates to “Day of Valor.” Historically, it marks the fall of Bataan in 1942, when over 76,000 Filipino and American soldiers weakened by hunger and disease were surrendered to Japanese troops and forced afterwards to walk 140 kilometers to Tarlac in the “Death March.” Only about 54,000 made it; the rest succumbed to dehydration, starvation, fatigue, heat exhaustion, or were simply executed at whim.
     
It’s been 71 years since that moment in time during World War II. I imagine those nameless, faceless soldiers, roughly our age, and their families—spouses, parents, siblings, sweethearts, friends—having to endure pain and suffering on a huge scale. Our generation is blessed that we didn’t have to go through anything like that.
     
History has always been a subject I’m fond of. I find that remembering these helps put things in perspective. These days, we have our mini-crises and mini-tragedies and we react like it’s the end of the world. I believe it’s not so much out of callousness or self-centeredness as it is of a lack of a reference point; we can just get so wrapped up in our little bubble, oblivious that there are other things happening everywhere else in the world.
     
One of my mentors, journalist Howie Severino, was telling me the other day about a book by German sociologist and philosopher Erich Fromm on holocaust survivors. Despite having been sent to the same concentration camp and subjected to the same horrifying tortures, two types of people emerged—those who chose to dwell on the darkness and stay embittered, and those who chose to see the light and be a source of it for others. Proof that in the end, it’s all about how we choose to see things.

        
     
Today is also the birthday of a person who reminded me of the same thing. Lester, a best friend of mine for nearly a decade, is a photographer and graphic designer based in New York, the one who got this blog started by taking its first photos. 
     
A week before my birthday, Lester asked me to meet with our friend Ali and pick up a package he had for me. I’ll need it for sure, he said. The day of our meet-up, I almost didn’t go as I was feeling blue and didn’t want Ali having lunch with a downer. 
      
Good thing I squared my shoulders and went anyway—I entered the café, didn’t find Ali, and spotted a guy who looks like Lester, staring at me with a poker face. Took me long to get over the fact that he was in Manila. He was right about me needing it for sure. 
       
We talked for hours, a fraction compared to the three years he was building his life in New York and I was busy with mine here. In that short amount of time, our conversation made me realize how much I had forgotten. I’d forgotten everything I said I’d be, in favor of what I said I’d never want to be. I’d neglected aspects of my life that deserved my attention more and channeled it instead into petty causes. I’d allowed myself to be crippled by my fears and failed to stay the brave go-getter he knew me as.
      
A lot of you have been sending sweet messages and asking when my next “proper” blog post would be (yeah I’ve been Instagramming to make up for it but I know it doesn’t really count heh). Since turning a year older, I’ve had to recalibrate, put priorities back in order from a distance where I can see the bigger picture. In perfect Paulo Coelhian timing, Lester wouldn’t be the only person I’d be reunited with, and I suddenly found myself blessed with opportunities to reconnect with people, places and things I’d been too preoccupied and afraid to go back to in the past. 
       
Today, “Araw ng Kagitingan,” I write this in honor of everyone who gives us our courage.

Wearing summer’s bright jewel tones. Blind Clothing one-shoulder dress, SM Accessories bag and bracelet, Asian Vogue peep-toe heels, My Gilded Nest earrrings, Dickies sunnies.

Hype this on Lookbook here, and Chictopia here. I prefer to just wear a few items at a time these days, instead of having on so many layers. Part of my aim to simplify life, perhaps.

Best thing about this season? You can wear your favorite hues and pretty much get away with it. I just love color!

This is what I wore to a casual meeting today. Since it was a hot afternoon, I thought I’d go all summery chic, wear a lot of brights and bare a little skin.

Speaking of bare, I didn’t have the time or patience to do full-on makeup, so I just brushed on a little blush, put on some red lipstick and left the rest of my face alone. There’s a lot going on in my outfit already, plus sunnies make great concealers anyway. Haha.

Pulled my hair into a messy bun because it’s the easiest lazy hair style to pull off, especially when your hair is the naturally wavy type that doesn’t like to be combed.

I was never a fan of sunny days, but I noticed that a lot of the things I used to like and not like have been evolving. Lately, I’ve been thinking of the sun as something to look forward to.

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Urban Goddess top, Cotton On skirt, Asian Vogue loafer pumps, SM Accessories clutch and bangle, Wanderlust bracelets. Hype this on Lookbook here and Chictopia here.

The day started with a migraine attack. Those who’ve seen me with one, know how bad it gets every time. All I see are blinding flashes of light for a half-hour, my limbs go numb, and unless I take meds, I throw up from the pain. Not a pretty sight, and definitely not a pleasant experience. Pretty traumatizing in fact that when I feel one coming on, I panic. But this time felt different—like nothing could stop me. I was excited to get to work!

Work meant going to the press junket for actress Troian Bellisario who plays Spencer Hastings on “Pretty Little Liars.” She was in town with her boyfriend, Patrick J. Adams, who plays Mike Ross on “Suits.” While I don’t follow “PLL” as religiously as “Suits,” I watch it for Troian. I find her beautiful, smart, independent and whole, a kind of girl I strive to be. Ever since I knew about them individually and as a couple, I’ve wanted to meet them.

So as soon as my vision returned, I drove as fast (and carefully) as I could from Pampanga to Quezon City, where my friend Abi joined me. She took over the wheel so I could do my makeup and try to fix my hair—in the end though, I just let it fall however it wanted. Haha.

My nails have been craving for servicing, too. I’d been practicing on the ukulele and I thought a manicure would be counter-productive. Heh. Just hoped the skirt, clutch and bracelets made up for it.

Thanks to a throbbing head and lack of prep, we arrived late at Marriott Hotel where the junket was being held. Now I admit, sometimes I can be a worrier and panic when things don’t go my way. But for some reason, the idea that I went through all that trouble and drove a hundred kilometers for nothing wasn’t bothering me one bit. Somehow, I felt like things were still going to be great.
     
And I was right. A few minutes later, I was taking Instagram photos with Troian and taking a video of Patrick saying hi to me.

Plus this awesome video of him greeting me on my birthday.
     

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Among others, this is one question we get asked too many times: aside from the obviousness of being a his-and-hers blog, what else makes us different?

First off, allow us to say that we believe blogs cannot really be compared with each other in terms of superiority or inferiority, as each one is unique and has features that set it apart from the rest. The point of this entry is simply to state what ours are, in response to the questions. The last thing we want is to get into any rifts or psywars, real or imagined. After all, we started this blog simply to celebrate our shared love for many things such as fashion. Most of the time, we just like to keep to ourselves, content in our own little world. 

This is why we’ve refrained from tackling this topic lest some take it the wrong way. But the start of this year taught us that no matter how careful you are with what you do, say, or even think, others will see what they want, hear what they want, believe what they want. So, disclaimers aside, let’s have at it for all you Tumblr Askers, email senders and talk attendees. What makes Love Chic different? We answer this by answering other blogging FAQs we’ve received over the past couple of years. Names/emails withheld by request.

Q: Do bloggers really have unlimited shopping funds? Is it true that even if you don’t, you’re always given stuff so you can afford to not repeat outfits for a year?
A: We’re not sure that it’s true or not for other bloggers, but in our case, all you have to do is browse our Archive. While we’re thankful for brands who send us gifts from time to time in appreciation of our blog, like any normal, ordinary person on the street, we have standard closet spaces in our homes and we repeat and mix and match our outfits all the time. Not because it’s a styling challenge for some fashion story or something but because we make do with what we have. And even if we did have unlimited shopping funds, we’d probably keep shopping department stores and inexpensive brands and spend the money on our dream house or a business venture or traveling or enrolling in language/music/art classes or giving huge regular donations to the Ateneo Scholarship Fund, to give back for Shai’s full scholarship in college. (By now you can probably guess that these are things we’d sink our money into should we win the lottery or something).

Q: Is it true that unless you come from a wealthy background, you can’t afford to blog? Seems like you’re all sosyal and have the time and money to pursue this.
A: Again, it may be the case for many, but not for all. In our case, we’ve always been very upfront with our readers regarding our middle-class (“commoner,” to the elitist) socio-economic background, just as we have been candid about how and why we can blog: Shai is in TV production, lifestyle journalism, clothes and accessories design and digital marketing and these enable us to be in charge of our own schedules. As for affording the clothes, anyone can afford the clothes we wear! We mention the brands in every post, and seldom will you see a high-end item (either a gift or a long-deliberated splurge). It’s not the brand, it’s not the price. It’s how you wear it.

Q: Style blogging looks so easy that anyone can do it. Why do only the same bloggers get freebies and invites to events all the time? What makes a good blogger?
A: True, style blogging is something anyone can do. All you need is your personal style, basic photography skills, decent photo-editing software, a camera and a computer with Internet. But there are bloggers who are ahead of the pack because they approach it much the same way they likely approach any other aspect of life: if it’s worth doing, it’s worth doing well. They give their best in everything they do and so reap the results. Of course, we can’t undermine that thing called luck: meeting the right people and being there when opportunity strikes. For us though, the really good bloggers are those who love blogging not for the perks, but for blogging itself. Having the passion and commitment without being overanalytical or taking themselves too seriously. They never let themselves forget that blogging is supposed to be fun; not the end-all and be-all of life.

Q: What else do fashion bloggers know how to do other than have picture-perfect hair, makeup and outfits 24/7 and look good in every photo?
A: One’s online persona is not and should not be taken as a 100% accurate representation of his or her real-life persona. We’re pretty sure bloggers don’t purposely set out to mislead readers or give off the impression that they look that good every single minute of the day, but this kind of thinking always seems to come up anyway. In our case, there are days when we have to dress up (meetings, events, etc.), there are days when we feel like dressing up (dates, parties, etc.) and there are days when we don’t dress up at all (the rest of the time). Readers who have run into us in public know for a fact that we go out of the house wearing plain-looking clothes and zero products on our face and hair. These you seldom see being blogged due to a thing called “curation.”

As for what else we can do? Aside from the skills one can presume we possess from our above-mentioned jobs, we’re happy to say that we bust some (quite unfair) notions about bloggers being all fancy and glamorous and not knowing much more beyond that. We’ve known how to cook, do housework (dishwashing, manual laundry, ironing, sweeping, polishing, gardening, car-cleaning, carpentry, the works) since we were both 8 or 9 years old. We both drive ourselves (manual, yes) to places and we also take public transport (Manila and provincial). We both know how to sew things (by hand and by machine), draw (certainly no artists, but at the very least passable) and do musical stuff (Shai sings and plays the piano and ukulele but then again, which Pinoy doesn’t? Haha).

While in college, Shai worked as a reporter, researcher and writer for different companies. Seph stopped schooling to work in a call center for a while. So an overheated car in the middle of nowhere or a seemingly insurmountable work crisis isn’t likely to have us bursting into hapless tears.

The long and short of it is that we’re blessed to have been raised by parents who made us self-reliant ever since we were kids. That way, we’re flexible: we can enjoy the finer things in life from time to time but the world doesn’t end just because a driver or household helper can’t come to work.

These might seem like no big deal to others, but to us, it is. More than being sent abroad to cover fashion events, more than being featured in local and international publications or on TV shows, more than all the other perks that this blog brings us, we’re proud that we’ve been able to pursue blogging despite not having all the resources, all the connections and all the luxuries that textbook-definition bloggers are supposed to have. We’re proud that we get to inspire readers as well as express ourselves. We’re proud of the skills and values our parents taught us that enabled us to acquire a few things on our own (with their guidance and support, of course). We may not wear luxury items, drive fancy cars or live in huge mansions, but we work hard to pay for what we do wear, what we do drive, and where we plan to live when we’re married. These, are what makes us different. ♥

On Seph: Chemistry button-down and pants, SM Accessories bag and watch, Skechers sneakers. Hype his Lookbook outfit here. On Shai: Chemistry dress, SM Accessories necklace and bag, Parisian booties. Hype her Lookbook outfit here. Favorite this look on our Chictopia here. Photographed by Richard Romero, assisted by Jeru Czar. Hair, makeup, styling and post-processing by Love Chic.

They say we experience similar things when we’re crying and laughing: eyes filling with tears, shoulders shaking, face muscles scrunched up, irregular breathing.
  
Our body reacts the same way to either hurt or happiness.
  
When your heart is filled with anger and hatred, every waking moment is a pain. You go to sleep harboring all these ill feelings, you wake up in the morning and as soon as your brain starts to load, the heaviness in your chest returns with the instant recollection of that person or incident that has caused you this much suffering. You go about your daily routine carrying this burden, unable to see the blessings you’re surrounded with. Ignoring and undermining the things you have that many people can only dream of. You get trapped under this dark cloud and the longer it lingers, the harder it becomes for you to see the bright side.
  
When your heart is filled with hope and gratefulness, every waking moment is a joy. You go to sleep feeling thankful for every good thing that comes your way despite the troubles and challenges. You wake up in the morning and as soon as your brain starts to load, a lightness fills you up and propels you out of bed raring to start a new day. You go about your daily routine marveling at the blessings you’re surrounded with, grateful that you have been given many reasons to marvel. You get wrapped up in this warm sunny disposition and the longer you bask in its glow, the harder it becomes for you to get affected by unpleasant things.
 
Hurt blinds you, prevents you from seeing all that is beautiful about life. Makes you take for granted every opportunity you could be making out of each problem, every person who has loved you unconditionally, every good thing they see in you. You’re so angry you can hardly remember how it feels to not feel this way.
 
Happiness binds you ever more to all the persons, amazing fortuities and experiences that make you feel loved. When faced with stress, you’re aware that things could be so much worse. It is an endless cycle of being grateful and welcoming more blessings in your life that you never run out of reasons to be happy.
  
The dark cloud or the sunshine. The choice is all but yours.
  
Note: We’re discontinuing Dear Love Chic and merging our more personal blog with our fashion blog. We write why here.